but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
