Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
ttyl tear gas
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
