I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
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