she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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