I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
