i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
