Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
