no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
