I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
