So drunk its hurt
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
