gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
