I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
