I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
