I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
