Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
