curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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