She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
