Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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