Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
