every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
