Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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