Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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