If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Randomize
