I didn't shave. On purpose
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
