Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
