She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
