problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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