We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
It's shark week go big or go home
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
