Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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