I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You had me at "let me see your balls"
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
