I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
