matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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