O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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