this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
