Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
