Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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