have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
