i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
