He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
