Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
