woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
