my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Someone came in the potted fern
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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