Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
