So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
