There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
