So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
