i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
