i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
