Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
