Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
that's an acceptable place to lick
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
